Silent Birthday Together.

Hi,

Saturday. 21st Birthday.

I woke up several times. Staying in bed staring into the celling. Thoughts running through my head. 21st Birthday for the first time. I'm old enough to be called an adult.

I lost trace of my thoughts went my roommate got up from his bed to take a shower. Not knowing that i'm awake. I fake my sleep.

Seeing him stocking his every move. Making sure he does not see me awake. He gets out of the room. A sign of relieve for me. Thoughts. Thoughts. That is all i think of...

I got up for my bed. Pondering all the time. In the shower. Seeing. My hand. My body. My feet. Wondering what has change. I'm lost in on my birthday. The shower seems long than it only took 5 minutes. Skin smells good. But in still with thoughts.

Thoughts filled my day. The clock tick by so fast than hours seems to drift past seemingly. I open my emails. Countless wishes to my surprise. Many say "Happy Birthday". Not a single thought run past me that time. 21 happy birthday seems, so nothing to me. It means nothing. Is just adds to another year of oldness. Yet i think, have i grown wiser? smarter? stronger? healthier? Unique-r?

i thought to myself what lesson have i thought my fellow people. What my 21 years have i taught others to be? Am i a good teacher? mentor? master?

Thoughts thoughts. Running through my head.

I gather myself. Collect my thoughts together. I have to do stuff today. I wish i shouldn't but i have too. School is what i'm here to do. During this time, thoughts still run through my head. Uncontrollability. Lost in thoughts.

The day went by. Night came as swift as sun went down. I walk alone road in my paradise. Have i done justice to my friends. Am i dear friend to friends. I guess so cause they seem to know me well.

Hours going by. I sit at the computer desk staring at the screen filled with English words.

Until a friend put a hand on my shoulder to tell me is good for me to follow him. I did. I went to McDonalds. He knows. He knows. how to put a smile on my face. a happy meal came fast as i thought of it. A dragon pop out from the happy meal box to put a smile on my face. Pretending to be a kid again just fills the heart.

I rest tonight to know that i have friends that care. Most important of all. Jesus Christ was on my mind the whole time. I guess i have to get back with work with him. My lover. My king. My brother. My lover.

Hey guys thank you for all the birthday wishes. Just want to say thank you again. God bless you too and do continue to pray for me. And never let go of Jesus Christ. Think of Him all the time. Worth it.

Good night.

=),