Hold Down&Up!!!

Hey,

Having a lot of thoughts lately and a lot of mix feelings. Is crazy. Sometimes that things are happening a bit to fast for me but i manage to keep up. I have come to realization that some how whatever i commit to do, i have a strong authority over it. What i mean is that is easy for me to give commands to others. Like some of you have witness me giving command over 107 kids on Discovery Days. Or other thing, is people ask me how to do this and that. Feeling that I'm at the center of all things. haha. Well is just a thought that is running through my head.

Been reading so many blogs and reading mine. I think i need to brush up on my English. I can't get around reading any book properly, i will some how never finish it or just fall a sleep on the first few pages. I more of a guy that need things fast pace. Like television. Where there are thousand of colors zooming pass in front of my eyes. Some how i prefer some thing audio-able and at the same time something black and white. So is like a read-a-long-audio-book. Hopefully one day that man will created a book with audio, So each word you read there will be words speaking too. Well feel free to leave a comment on my writing. I some how to grow better writing.

Some of you have come to my room before and see a number of books, most of the books in my room have a lot of pictures. It helps me to focus better. The other books that don't have much picture are the Bible and more Bible and maybe some devotion books and research Bible books. Other than that, all are picture books.

You know this pass few years, I'm beginning to realize that I got less money and more less money coming in to my pocket. Not that i borrow people. Not that i spend much. Is just less. Not like my school days, where i use to have a lot of money. usually i can buy like three pairs of Nike shoe in a year. Now this year, I'm down to one pair and maybe one more pair my Christmas. The money coming in is slower than the the money going out. This is so heart braking. With the things i need this year, i don't have the income to get those items. Have to work on it. Hopefully i can get help. =)

I don't understand why people think that I'm emo or depress. Do you see me always alone and wanting to kill myself or listening to some like emo shit to cry my heart out. i still don't understand why people think that I'm emo. Is it that i don't put a smile on my face, means I'm emo? How sure are you that I'm emo? So if put on a serious face on, does it count as emo? I think is a bad attitude to walk at somebody and then say why so emo? At times it hurts when people say that to me. It is disgusting. Start a proper conversation, like "How are you?" then see the conversation goes from there. i tell you, how in the world do you know my feelings. I give you a quote 'Don't judge a book by it's cover'. The face can show you only what is in the surface, what matters is skin deep. Really i still don't understand by emo. Tell me or comment on it. What makes you say that I'm emo?

Things in my life is just getting a lot more harder. I wish that i can know my future. Hate it when is a mystery. Wouldn't it be easier to know your future. Then you can work on it and achieve it faster. Some things are better left in the unknown. Wish that God let us know some clues of the future. Well i think i should just left it here.

Man, my room is in a mess. super mess. I shall pick up where i left off. Finish cleaning. handsome little room. =) so now i shall play some games and quickly get my documents done and out.

To the moon,